Was a day it sucked to be me.

I started my day sans coffee and was still in a slight daze when I got to my first stop of the day when I had to take a part out of the truck and take it in to have other parts made off it.

Whereupon I closed the truck door on my head. Hard.

us Ogs are a durable lot, so though the pain put me to my knees temporarily, I went about my business. At my next stop, did almost the same thing to the other side of my head, only this time with a machine door. I have matching bumps even now. At lunch, I was chewing a piece of the bread that came with my tomato soup, and bit the inside of my cheek and my tongue at the same time. I think I drew blood in both places.

This morning, Partner and I accompanied Midwest Chick and Mr B to the Napanee funshow. Ed was supposed to come but he was under the weather, unfortunately.

We got to the show, and the joint was already jumping. So we went to the restaurant next door for breakfast, which Mr B had been billing as a Most Excellent Amish Buffet.

Sure, they had amish, panfried and boiled, and a few broasted… No, wait, it was a buffet RUN by amish people, sorry.

What they did have, was a simple breakfast buffet. Hashbrowns, eggs, biscuits, gravy, snausage patties, bacon. Did I mention they had bacon?

I had some eggs and some hashbrowns, some biscuits and gravy, and then i tasted the bacon.

And then I could feel my eyes roll back up into my head, and glaze over.

I went to my happy place. My happy bacon place. I felt the crunchy, perfectly cooked bacon slide down my throat like a tasty elixer, helmeted OompahLoompahs with shovels loading the cholestrol into my arteries while horses pulling somber black quickbuggies loadeed with menonite women in brightly colored dresses waving slabs of uncooked porkbellies. I had the dream of the Holstein Hogs.

I noticed laughing and pointing about the time my plate was once again empty. I staggered back into line for more tasty bacon, and eventually had to go to the funshow.

Still. The bacon is there, it calls me, from hells eart it stabs at me, for tastiness’ sake it spits it’s last fat gram at me.

Someday, I will return.

Meanwhile, it made Friday bearable. By comparison, anyway.