{"id":1020,"date":"2006-09-14T21:29:20","date_gmt":"2006-09-15T02:29:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/69.50.194.231\/~vqplgdbg\/?p=1020"},"modified":"2006-09-14T21:29:20","modified_gmt":"2006-09-15T02:29:20","slug":"the-evil-twin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=1020","title":{"rendered":"The evil twin"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Tried to take a picture of it, but couldn&#8217;t quite. <\/p>\n<p>After reading <a href=\"http:\/\/abcnews.go.com\/Primetime\/story?id=2346476&amp;page=1\">this story<\/a> linked by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.velociworld.com\/Velociblog\/Oldvelocity\/002840.html\">Vman<\/a> I thought, Hey, I have an evil twin too.<\/p>\n<p>Mine, unfortunately, is not the cause of my distended belly- that is the result of far too many pizzas and extra helpings of Roast Beast. No, my evil twin takes the form of a wild hair and a mole on my right ring finger- a hair like no other on my body, and a mole looking like no other I have. So I name it my congenitally connected twin.  And call it Nathan. I expect him to begin growing soon. I&#8217;m going to be a little embarrassed after all the times he&#8217;s watched me rub one out while surfing porn. Imagine if he grows to be an aloof erudite gentleman, how he&#8217;ll hate having budded forth from a hirsute neanderthal. <\/p>\n<p>Fuck him. I&#8217;m pulling the hair out. He&#8217;ll grow up bald.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tried to take a picture of it, but couldn&#8217;t quite. After reading this story linked by Vman I thought, Hey, I have an evil twin too. Mine, unfortunately, is not the cause of my distended belly- that is the result of far too many pizzas and extra helpings of Roast Beast. No, my evil twin [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1020","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1020"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1020"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1020"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1020"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}