Last weekend the wife cooked a huge ham, complete with large bone, which Mom then took and made into bean soup. Now, I’m a huge fan of bean soup, but homemade bean soup, with the bone of an enormous ham, it’s divine.<\/p>\n
Consequently, I am a toxic waste dump. Things have been coming out of me that shouldn’t exit a living creature. I have had to install a fan in the Cubicle of Og. My cube neighbors are threatening revolt. I am, in a word, revolting.<\/p>\n
Man, it’s a beautiful thing. If there is anything more satisfying than a loud, dry fart, it is if that fart is noxious in the extreme, making the atmosphere in your immediate vicinity unbearable to civilized humans. <\/p>\n
My uncle Calvin, God Rest His Soul, once released a particularly loud (and long lasting) fart on a walk in his grape arbors. The tone was pure and had great duration. On ending, he said “a man can fart like that, can’t be too much wrong with him” <\/p>\n
At this point in my life, I can understand his meaning; anytime you get gas and not lumps, anytime there aren’t smoke rings or bacon strips in the BVD’s, you’re OK. <\/p>\n
TMI? Maybe. Still: If you don’t know this simple truth, trust me, someday you will.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Last weekend the wife cooked a huge ham, complete with large bone, which Mom then took and made into bean soup. Now, I’m a huge fan of bean soup, but homemade bean soup, with the bone of an enormous ham, it’s divine. Consequently, I am a toxic waste dump. Things have been coming out of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-200","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/200"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=200"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/200\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=200"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=200"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=200"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}