{"id":3221,"date":"2009-09-07T06:37:45","date_gmt":"2009-09-07T11:37:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=3221"},"modified":"2009-09-07T06:37:45","modified_gmt":"2009-09-07T11:37:45","slug":"concerned-about-swine-flu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=3221","title":{"rendered":"Concerned about Swine Flu?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Don&#8217;t be. According to statistics, you&#8217;re much more likely to find a weak spot in the second floor, fall through the floor and the ceiling below it,  land facefirst in the toilet, get your head wedged in and drown.  You&#8217;re more likely to stand on a land mine and be flung 1200 feet up in the air, utterly unharmed, until being sucked into the jet engine of a 747 on approach. You&#8217;re much more likely to be standing next to a mountain in colorado, and be smothered by an avalanche of breasteses. You&#8217;re equally likely to be involuntarily anally probed in your kitchen by aliens. No, not them ones from outer space, them ones from south of the border. <\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t sweat it, really. Even if you get it, unless you&#8217;re old or have a bad immune system, you&#8217;re just going to feel like crap for a while. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Don&#8217;t be. According to statistics, you&#8217;re much more likely to find a weak spot in the second floor, fall through the floor and the ceiling below it, land facefirst in the toilet, get your head wedged in and drown. You&#8217;re more likely to stand on a land mine and be flung 1200 feet up in [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3221","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3221","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3221"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3221\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3221"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3221"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3221"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}