In actuality, marriage is a contract between people. It’s a very private contract, and it’s conditions are sometimes not even fully known to the entrants of the contract themselves, until certain boundaries are crossed. <\/p>\n
The Ogwife and I were married to one another long before we engaged in any ceremony, we made that commitment to one another and have stuck by it. it has certainly been one of the most important decisions in my life. <\/p>\n
And to me, it was a very private one. To most men, I imagine, the wedding is less important than the marriage, the wedding is an expensive party they throw so that their friends can celebrate with them; to women, the day has a different feel that I don’t completely comprehend.<\/p>\n
For the Ogwife to come from the Great White North and live here, we had to be legally married. And that was fine by me; I was perfectly happy to let the official record show that we were bound to one another.<\/p>\n
Because of my past, I was unable to do this within the Church, so we were married by a non denominational minister. As far as I was concerned, this was strictly a legal civil ceremony, and that was all I desired. <\/p>\n
I invited nobody to this but Partner, who stood as my Best Man. As far as I was concerned, the Law requires five people. the bride and groom, two witnesses, and a minister. The sixth person is not only unnecessary, but persona non grata. <\/p>\n
But the Ogwife’s full crew attended, and they are a noisy and boisterous bunch, though short, and I was fine by this; after all, this celebration was all about her, not me. I just needed a piece of paper, so she could move in with me.<\/p>\n
To anyone who has been in a real relationship, you understand that the relationship is not based on some farcical aquatic ceremony<\/strike> the big wingding you throw for your family and friends to get liquored up at, the relationship is based on your commitment for one another. All humans, though, being what they are, tend to think of beginnings and ends, and like to have demarcations as to when those beginnings and ends occurred. Like a baptism or a briss or a funeral or a confirmation or a bar mitsvah, there are often public markers to accentuate the transition between the state- for instance, of being single and being married.<\/p>\n
There is certainly no issue with gay people wanting these markers, of course, because it is human nature. The civil ceremony that allows this to happen is a really good idea, and for those who want to feel that the Creator has blessed their union, there are plenty of churches who will perform that ceremony. <\/p>\n
But plenty will not.<\/p>\n
That is the crux of the matter, and many people who listen to me yap love to simply dismiss me as an ignorant rube, but I’ve been studying this issue (Among many others) since I entered the seminary in Finding what you’re looking for JB?. <\/strong>I have some history. <\/p>\n I am amused at people who have no issues with this, and who “believe” that everything will be OK, there’s no reason for any church to worry, because “They have an exemption!!”<\/p>\n Here’s a little hint for anyone who has their finger that far away from the clue button: Like the Healthcare law, like gun laws, like anything that codifies anything: if it begins it’s life requiring exemptions, it is most likely a bad thing. And exemptions that are granted can be revoked. I’m amused that suddenly we can trust the FedGov to grant exemptions and not change it’s mind. <\/p>\n I wish I was wrong on this, but I am not. I don’t give a shit that people think I’m a rube for thinking this, because I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks of me period. I do give a shit what happens to Christianity, and it is obvious that the desire to shut down Christianity is there, among the gay population. You don’t have to look hard; after the Prop 8 kerfuffle the gays in Cali were running around yelling shit like “Burn their fucking churches, then tax charred timbers”<\/a>(the link goes to a gay conservative website, not the originator of that spiteful shit)<\/p>\n No, that’s just a few radicals, we should never base anything on what those few radicals say. Like those few Islamic radicals. The rest of them are so nice!<\/p>\n As I have said here before: the Civil Union law in Illinois has my complete support. I also have no issue with churches who are willing to marry gay couples, and report those marriages as civil unions. I myself have credentials from the Universal Life Church that allow me to marry people, have had for ages. Why? because I officiated at the ceremony of a couple gay friends of mine. No, it wasn’t legally binding, but it gave them a public way to express their feelings for one another, and I was happy to oblige. Someday I’ll dig out the sermon I gave and post it, if I can find it. I had it on a ss\/sd floppy from my Apple 2e.<\/p>\n The gay marriage thing always has been and always will be a tool to force the churches to accept the Gay lifestyle, and if they cannot, to put them out of business. But don’t pay any attention to an ignernt redneck homophobic bible thumping fool like me, just wait. (the idea that I am homophobic is so bizarre that I cannot describe the amusement I derive from THAT.)<\/p>\n I know I won’t get anyone to open their eyes and look outside what they “believe” and see what’s going on in the observable world, but I had to try, stupid as I am for doing so. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In actuality, marriage is a contract between people. It’s a very private contract, and it’s conditions are sometimes not even fully known to the entrants of the contract themselves, until certain boundaries are crossed. The Ogwife and I were married to one another long before we engaged in any ceremony, we made that commitment to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4468","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4468"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4468"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4468\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4468"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4468"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4468"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}