{"id":4628,"date":"2011-09-11T18:16:01","date_gmt":"2011-09-11T23:16:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=4628"},"modified":"2011-09-12T06:27:51","modified_gmt":"2011-09-12T11:27:51","slug":"strange","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=4628","title":{"rendered":"Strange."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>But then, my dreams are. <\/p>\n<p>Fact is, I dreampt about going to church- but not the church we normally go to. Somehow it was a scaled-up version of the church I went to when I was a kid, and the bishop was saying mass. It wasn&#8217;t the bishop of our diocese, it was the bishop of Toronto, Thomas Christopher Collins. I don&#8217;t know why I would dream of a bishop named after a drink, but there you are. Anyway, his crosier was made of a buttload of Craftsman 1\/2&#8243; drive ratchet extensions snapped together, and occasionallyhe would slap  it against his hand like a sap, and it would clink loudly.<\/p>\n<p>He wasn&#8217;t wearing a miter, either. he did have the traditional Zuchetto on, but when the bishop traditionally puts on the Miter, he instead donned a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.simplyoz.com\/products\/australian_souvenirs__music\/australian_souvernirs\/cork_hat\">cork hat.<\/a>  During the offertory, the choir sang Walzing Matilda until he yelled at them to stop. Then they switched over to singing <a href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=0iOdmb8BnIw\">&#8220;Another night&#8221;<\/a> and his Excellency Tom Collins started tuning them up with his Craftsman Crosier. <\/p>\n<p>For some reason I had a T bone steak, and I gnawed away at it until it was just the bone, and then the bone turned into a Luger. I was gonna shoot the bishop, but the Oglet said &#8220;You&#8217;ll miss. Give me that!&#8221; so I did, and she dropped him like a bad habit. I thought we were going to have to shoot our way out, but the whole congregation started singing &#8220;Ding Dong, the witch is dead&#8221; and carried the still armed oglet out of the church on their shoulders.<\/p>\n<p>I have no recollection of eating anything unusual. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>But then, my dreams are. Fact is, I dreampt about going to church- but not the church we normally go to. Somehow it was a scaled-up version of the church I went to when I was a kid, and the bishop was saying mass. It wasn&#8217;t the bishop of our diocese, it was the bishop [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4628","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4628","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4628"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4628\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4628"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4628"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4628"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}