{"id":6981,"date":"2015-02-08T12:05:06","date_gmt":"2015-02-08T17:05:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=6981"},"modified":"2015-02-08T12:05:06","modified_gmt":"2015-02-08T17:05:06","slug":"the-evasive-avocado","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/?p=6981","title":{"rendered":"The Evasive Avocado"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Just after the first of the year, when the Oglet was home on vacation, I thought, I will make some Bubba Burgers, and I will put on them some salsa and avocado, and they will be extra tasty. <\/p>\n<p>So I went and got some bubba burgers. There is always salsa in the house. And I got a perfect avocado. Plenty to put a couple slices on each of three burgers for the wife, the oglet, and I. <\/p>\n<p>I came home, and unpacked, and was just about to toss the bag in the trash when I felt a lump; I reached into the bag and pulled out the avocado I had temporarily forgotten. And then I sat it on the counter. <\/p>\n<p>At which point it disappeared forever. <\/p>\n<p>At first I thought I was being gaslighted, but the wife and daughter swore they hadn&#8217;t touched it. <\/p>\n<p>By now, I thought a trail of gnats would lead us to it, but so far no luck. I figure it will turn up someday, but the longer it takes the less I look forward to it. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Just after the first of the year, when the Oglet was home on vacation, I thought, I will make some Bubba Burgers, and I will put on them some salsa and avocado, and they will be extra tasty. So I went and got some bubba burgers. There is always salsa in the house. And I [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6981","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6981"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6981"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6981\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6982,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6981\/revisions\/6982"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6981"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6981"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/neanderpundit.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6981"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}