Neanderpundit

When i first started working at Inland, I was day labor for a few weeks before I began my machinist’s apprenticeship.

I pushed broom a lot, and cleaned a lot of showers. When they get a “new” kid, one of the things they often have him do is clean crappers, and at Inland, that was as distasteful a job as you can get. See, steelworkers are a rare breed at best, but their bathroom habits are, well, foul. They will see a clogged crapper and continue to use it until it’s filled to the rim.

The deal was to get a piece of pipe about four feet long, connect it to a hose, and hand it to the new kid. You then went off and connected the other end, not to a water outlet, but to a live steam valve. The kid was supposed to hold the pipe in the crapper, and when you turned on the steam, get covered with filth.

Well, I was wet behind the ears, but not THAT wet. I screwed a little ball valve between the pipe and the hose, and turned it off. When the crew leader didn’t hear me swearing, he came in and I feigned inexperience, poking and stirring the shit in the bowl. He looked at me, felt the hose to make sure the steam was on, then looked at the end of the pipe to make sure it wasn’t clogged. Then he looked at the end of the pipe i was holding, grabbed it from me, and said “there’s not supposed to be a valve on this!!!” Jammed it in the crapper and turned the valve on.

I managed to stand back just in time.

He stripped out of his clothes right there, and walked the half block to the showers naked but for his safety shoes.

He still had bits of toilet paper in his hair after the shower, so he just borrowed a razor and shaved his head. He had me transferred to a different crew after that.

Last fall, in a moment of inattention that is extremely unusual for me, I drove off with one of your gas nozzles.

NO, actually, I didn’t drive OFF with it, I just pulled forward until I felt the breakaway joint breakaway, and stopped, cursing under my breath, and took the nozzle out and placed it on the ground.

Not being one to walk away from my mistakes, I went into the store to let them know, filled out the appropriate form, and went about my day.

Then, several months later, I get a bill for $72, for repairing the hose.

Now, let me splain something to you, lucy: When a guy “repairs” that hose, they take the two ends, push them together, and they “click”. As long as the seals are intact, whcih can be inspected visually, this is all that’s required. A strong eight year old boy can do it easily. As can a fit man in his eighties. Why it should cost $72 is beyond me, but that is inconsequential. You paid that, and I paid you.

Now, dozens of times in a month some fuckknuckle drives off with a hose at that specific store. Most of the time, they actually drive off with it, requiring you to install a NEW hose. That store has a policy of not hunting those people down, so the actual criminals, the ones who are doing you the most harm, go unpunished, while the people like me, who are honest and own up to their mistakes, have to pay the bill.

This, incidentally, is why there is no useful form of gun control; people who will follow the rules and obey the law are never the problem.

Anyway, I called and said to the obudsman at BP, and said, “I have been a loyal customer for at least ten years. Can’t we just overlook this moment of inattention on my part?” (not expecting anything, but hell, you gotta ask, right?) The extremely rude BP representative made it clear that not only was I going to “pay the $72, but you should consider yourself lucky BP doesn’t press charges”

Nice.

SO here’s some math for you, you asshats.

I buy around 40 gallons of gas a week. That’s around $90, at today’s prices. Times 52, $4680. Timesthe next 20 years? $93,600 Still, for a corporation like BP Amoco, chump change.

But, I convinced our corporation to drop the BP cards, and switch to Shell cards. So, there’s 128 employess, who average about the same gas usage, who will not be buying BP gas anymore. So, that $93,600 becomes $11,980,800 over the next twenty years, that you pissed away because you HAD TO HAVE that $72. Good for you. Choke on it.

Fucktards.

Suck