Note to self crapblogging
If you stand, and see the crapper full of blood red liquid, try to remember that the Crystal Light you drank last night has red dye number whatever, before you start freaking out.
10 comments Og | Uncategorized
Wednesday 06 Jun 2007
I’d still freak. That ain’t right.
It would scare the shit out of me.
swmbo
LMAO here, boss.
Used to do that with my kids. When they were babies, mashed carrots and blueberries would do the oddest thing to their poops (I’m sorry, you can’t call a baby’s shit “crap”, it has to be called “poop”. There’s a bylaw somewhere, honest).
Carrots, the Gerber baby food variety, used to turn my son’s poop bright screaming orange. Day-glo, almost. First time I saw screaming orange poop in the diaper I nearly fainted. Thought the boy was going to explode or something…
My daughter, who LOOOOOVES her some blueberries, would literally consume an entire package by herself even as a toddler. Those poops came out black as night.
See, this is where the phrase “A little knowledge is a dangerous thing” applies. I’ve got enough of a biological/A&P/medical background to know that black stools are A Very Bad Thing. So I commence panicking in full-blown “scared Dad” phase.
For about 10 seconds, when it hit me that she’d consumed easily a pint of blueberries earlier that day.
That adrenaline rush is amazing, isn’t it???
Similar experience with beets. I thought I had lost my large intestine!
Yeah, sloe gin can do that to ya too. UGH!
LOL @JayG. Yeah, a bylaw somewhere. And Gawd, please remember if ya feed a child raspberry ice cream the poopie comes out black as tar! Hahaha!
This one time, The Boy ate a Ginormous amount of Blue Cotton Candy- Those Smurf Turds were a Hoot!
BAWhahah snort!!!
I’m crying over here, this is great stuff!! thanks for the laugh.
Dick’s right – ‘that shit ain’t right.’
A Russian lady friend of mine makes borsch (sp?).
Damn near had a coniption after seeing THAT residue…
Oh gods, I love this blog!
Caviar… will do baaaad things to the results of your morning meditations. Very baaaaddd.