Neanderpundit

See bitch weasel. See Dick snap. Run, bitch, run!

Verbatim from Dick’s email to me tonight:
First thing that evil fucking bitch from Nationwide said to me was, “if your wife wouldn’t have hit our client, we wouldn’t have to do this.”
A second earlier I was in a pleasant conversation about the value of Kelly’s ’07 Eclipse. Yeah, the bitch pushed the wrong button.
“Excuse me?” I asked, not quite believing what I heard.
“Well,” she said, as if she wanted to test me, “your wife hit our client, which is what caused this mess to begin with.”
Mount Saint Helens had nothing on me. I fucking exploded.
“Excuse the fuck out’ve me? Did somebody fuck up and claim this was my wife’s fault, or did Nationwide get into the business of paying just for the fucking fun of it? Get me your boss on the phone. You’re a God damn idiot.”
Mr. Dick, you really don’t have to use that kind of language,” she retorted.
Her name is Crystal, if that matters. And yeah, her ass is gonna be famous if she keeps this shit up.
“Now, what about the car. KBB (Kelly Blue Book) lists it at $19,400.00. You guys stroke her a check for that, plus T.T&L, plus dealer’s fees, plus and an additional $360.00 for the tint, six CDs still stuck in the changer, and the window tint, and we’ll call it good.”

“We don’t pay like that, Mr. Dick.”
“Oh yeah, how do you pay? What is your standard?” I asked.
“Fair market value, of course.”
“Whose fair market value?
“CCC’s,” she replied.
“Who are they?”
“That’s who we use to ascertain the value of used cars. Tell me about what was wrong with your wife’s car.”
“What? Nothing… It was a perfect car.”
“Oh, come on… All owners say that about their cars. What was it really like?” She almost mocked me.
“You and me are gonna have a long week, sweetie.” I let her know. I wasn’t kidding.
“Hey, tell me about the bonus system there?” I asked.
“What, I don’t understand.”
“You know… For every dollar you fuck the victim out of, you get a bonus of some sort.”
“Mr. Dick, that’s rude to even begin to insinuate! We don’t do that!”
“You’re full of shit, ma’am, now let’s talk about money.”
“Okay, but let’s go over the car first, shall we? Your car had 13,752 miles miles on it.”
“Really, how’d you figured that?” I was wondering where the extra 2700 miles came from.
“We flashed it.”
“Ma’am, either your people are idiots, or liars. What are ya gonna go with?”
“Excuse me?”
“The car had 11,000 miles on it.”
“Can you prove that?”
“Yep. Where do you want me to fax the service receipt from last Saturday?”

The ignorant bitch gave me a fax number and told me we’d continue in the morning. I’m gonna eat this bitch and her boss for fucking breakfast.
Fuck you Nationwide. Pay up.

Dick

Novocaine first, then a big old plunger of cortisone. “Hey, you’re not pumping up a soccer ball here”. Felt better instantly, then the caine wore off around two, but it’s already better than usual.

Now I have a good headcold or allergy or something causing my vertigo to flare up.

If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.

you forget what it was like to have to maintain things.

Last night after finishing the upper lawn I drove the tractor downhill to hit the lower lawn, wherupon it died. I futzed with it for a while, but then gave in and came up the hill for several hours to work on the Doctor’s truck.

We did front shocks and left upper and lower balljoints, and he was headed back down the road, happier and safer. Well, actually, he crashed here overnight and headed out in the morning.

Me, after mass, i went down and looked at the old girl having assumed whatever it was would self-correct- but it had not.

Anyone who does internal combustion knows that for a gas engine to run you have to have three things: Compression, fuel, and fire. I knew there was plenty of compression, and I was confident in the fuel, but I figured I better check for fire. I yanked the plug and put in a graduated gap, and no fire.

I’d forgotten that engines built before electronic ignition often needed to be maintained.

I yanked the cover and tested the gap, and sure enough it was around .045. I’m surprised it was running at all. The published data puts the gap at .020. So I regapped, and reassembled, and it fired on the first turn.

I’d only forgotten it for a minute. But it comes back, yes indeed. I even remembered the spec offhand.

I just need to be closer to the vehicle that has points and further from the electronics. I like that more.