Neanderpundit

enjoying my corned beef hash omelette, drying off after my shower, I realized that I have a good solid handful of pubic hair about a foot and a half long. Time for some grooming, lord knows.

On the subject of grooming and hygeine:

Guys, keep your shit clean. I’m boggled by the guys I see, the way they treat their junk. If you’ve spent part of your day on a public crapper, dangling your business end in the bowl of a foreign john, with god-knows what bacteria and bullshit living therin, and you expect to take that tool home and get someone interested in it, GET IT CLEAN. I cannot IMAGINE crawling in bed with the Ogwife without a careful scrub of the equipment. Further, I’ve seen guys actually RUB THEIR TOOLS on the EDGE OF THE URINAL to get off the last drops. Never heard of a little shake, motherfucker? I’m told this is peculiar to Arabs. After doing that I’d have to exfoliate the Morel with Lava before I brought it anywhere near a woman.

Anyway. Clean that stuff. Get it clean enough that it disgusts you to touch it unless you wash your hands FIRST.

Thatisall.

“All you have to do is follow three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it’s absolutely necessary. And three, be nice. ”

And keep on being nice. Until it’s time to stop being nice.

See, here’s the thing. Breda is, from all I can tell (from reading her blog) One of the most well reasoned bloggers out there, aside from being a particularly fine person. And I will also admit having a thing for librarians, having found the attention of a particularly good one when i was a preteen. She spread vistas before me so well that I had travelled the word and space and time before I was twelve. And I imagine Breda to be that sort of person.

Anyway, dragging this around away from my own twisted adolescent fantasies back onto point, Breda has made it clear that she won’t be taking any liberals to the range, and i wholeheartedly agree. If you voted Obama, she feels, you don’t have much respect for me or my rights. And she’s spot on.

i tend to take this a step further, following Dalton’s rule: When it’s time to STOP being nice, stop being nice. Oh, you can certainly be civil, but you can’t ever underestimate your opponent. The good thing? You can get him to underestimate you. And that is precisely what you must do.

I have a soft spot for the people I know, and I hope and pray that they all do well, and I do everything in my power to treat those I love and respect with as much dignity and decency as I can muster. There is a powerful lot of bullshit in the world, and anything I can do to make anyone’s day nicer, I try to do.

To those who have voted Obama, and those who have figured that we don’t deserve the right to free speech, and to defend ourselves, I have one thing to say: You have lost your humanity in my eyes, and you no longer deserve nor will you get my sympathy nor my well wishes. I will continue to pray for you, that you may come to reason, but I’m damned if I’m going to treat you with kid gloves. You have no respect for me or my rights, and I will show none to you. So the Toms of the world, the ‘anonymous” at Breda… Keep thinking of me as some hick rube. Unenlightened. Yadda yadda.

I like it when you think that. So, I bet, does Breda.

Loved this AOL poll:

You either gave it a thumbs up, or didn’t watch.

Nope. No bias here. And no, it’s not photoshopped.