Unearned trophy
Tammi tells a story of a roadside deer encounter and a fish on a board.
This brought some memories back, I have to tell you.
it’s 1998. I’m on my way to work, heading north on 394. I see a big champagne colored Escalade.
Escalade? pussy. Champagne? yuppie pussy.
Anway, traffic is fairly heavy, not the least because of Escalade boy. As I approach, I realize that Escalade boy has pulled up to a deer alongside the road , and as the deer has a nice typical rack, is trying to save the head.
So he’s using the one impliment he has to separate the head from the body.
A tire iron.
He’s swinging away at the deer’s neck, trying to separate the head from the body, and his aim is bad, and he’s just turning the neck into hamburger. He’s spraying blood and bone and fleckls of meat at the tan pants and white shirt he’s wearing, and he looks like an axe murderer fresh from a spree. I wonder if he’s going to go to work like this, and if he even knows what he looks like. He’s only focused on getting this rack.
I drive past and see that the front end of the Escalade is untouched- being mostly plastic afore, they tend to self destruct on contact with woodland creatures. he didn’t even hit the deer himself.
Anyway, as anyone knows, Deer antlers are only valuable if you hunt them yourself, be that with a rifle, shotgun… or pickup truck.
10 comments Og | Uncategorized
What a dumb ass.
I’ll take all the low-value deer antlers I can get.
I use them to make pressure-flakers, which in turn I use to knap stone tools like arrowheads and knives.
Many moons ago I was in the Northern Territory when I passed a group of backpackers parked on the side of the road. They were taking each others photo with a dead bullock, which had been there a few days and had bloated up. They were doing the Great White Hunter/ Foot on The Trophy pose. It would only have taken a moderate amount of pressure and kablooyey. Pity it stayed intact.
Used to be in the rock and roll business that tour shirts and jackets had a certain cachet. But then they’d let just ANYone buy one, and all of a sudden, it’s all leather bomber jackets and flannel shirts.
Some people will ruin anything for the rest of us because they want something but aren’t willing to earn it.
Sorta like John Effin’ Kerry, come to think of it.
M
Antlers are valuable even if you didn’t kill the deer yourself. Useful for various crafts and all.
(Escalade-boy wasn’t very well prepared. Back seat area of my truck has a machete, a folding shovel (a German surplus one you could beat someone to death with, not a wimpy tri-fold), and a bow saw… and I’m not even a hunter.)
All you need to know about the man is encapsulated in one word: Escalade.
A Chevy Avalanche with different badges, selling for $15K more.
Style over substance. Badge engineering.
IOW, a moron stuck on appearances.
Um…eeewwww! Then again he was driving an Escalade, so what can we expect.
I tend to disregard road kill.
I’m just weird that way.
Oh, Good God.
But somehow I have to give him points for trying. Even though it is oh so wrong….
WOW – I could not imagein seeing that along the highway…. What a poser!!