So the Ogwife grabs the 12 pack of asswipe on top of the pile, brings it home. Not until she gets it home does she realize that though the packaging is similar to our “Regular” brand, it’s not the same. Turns out it’s the stuff they use in public crappers- the thickness of a moth’s wing, and the absorbency of waxed paper. Plus, it has the added bonus of having no strength whatsoever; your fingers go through the paper effortlessly. I have touched my still-soiled naked rectum with my bare hands so often I’m beginning to wonder if I was a proctologist in a previous life.

Anyway, being frugal (read: cheap bastards) we will use it until it’s gone. God, I hope that’s soon.