Good lord.
One post about a bluetooth device brings the phone retards out of the woodworks.
Listen: If YOU are too stupid and uncoordinated to drive a car and talk on the phone at the same time, by all means, do NOT do so. I can. And do. I can drive 75 mph on twisty country roads and talk on the phone AND eat a cheeseburger. This is not for everyone. In fact, most people should NOT do this. Most people should also not operate an engine lathe, either, but that doesn’t mean that I cannot. Piss off. I’ll put my driving record against anybodies, I only know two people who drive more than me, and they ALSO have coordination.
16 comments Og | Uncategorized
I can drive 75 mph on twisty country roads, talk on the phone, eat a cheeseburger, masturbate, and walk the dog. All at the same time.
But then, you’re a dick.
I’m not saying there aren’t idiots out there, I’m just not one of them. I’d LOVE to see some of the cellphone trolls take you on, Dick, stick around, maybe they’ll come back.
I can almost do all of Dick’s work, and with a manual transmission.
Almost in that I don’t need to whack off en-route. That’s what blondes and tilt-steering wheels are for.
Jim
Sloop New Dawn
Galveston, TX
Og, I may have your driving totals beat for the past coupla years. Maybe not. But I can state from experience that it’s possible to eat Chicken Lo Mein with chopsticks while traveling a major highway in traffic.
I guess I am a cell phone troll because I can’t do it. All bets were off when I was on the main drag with a herd of other old aged morons who can’t drive either! Even with your lightning quick reflexes you kids had better keep a sharp eye on the road when us old farts are on it. I had a voice mail feature on my phone that would allow me to call back when I could pull over.
I figured that I am better off safe than sorry last week. I gave the keys to my grandson and told him to take good care of my old New Yorker. I guess it is officially an antique now but it is in great shape and should give him lots of years of good driving. I should be thankful to give up the hassles of repairs, traffic and maintenance, but hanging up the keys was a very dismal experience for me.
Be careful, you guys. Stay safe.
rusty I’m no spring chicken. I just know my limitations and never push them.
I probably don’t drive as much as you, og, but I log the miles.
I bought my truck in August 2005, and it had 300 transport miles. It now has over 76,000. In the first year I had it, averaged 75mi/day for 365. Now, I commute 100mi/day just to get to the office. I am 25 and have been driving for about 20 years. I love being a farm kid.
Very seldom use the hands free. Can’t ever find it. Hold the phone to the ear, smoking a pipe, dodging in and out of Illinois Interstate Fucktards. Good Times.
Heh. I can feel my coordination and attention to the road degrade when I’m on the phone. Worse if it’s handheld, but still true hands-free.
I bet I can shoot better than that arrogant peckerhead though.
sure john. but you stay within your limitations.
Jim smoked me with the manual.
Damn…
I’m no great driver myself, but I used to know a one-armed girl with a manual who could put on makeup while talking on a rotary phone and eating Indian food traditionally…
Bah… I think you guys win.
If I stopped for every call while working, never would leave the driveway.
And I average about 40k business miles a year.
Back when I had a *real* job, had to use the cell phone to let either the boss or the next customer I was in route to repair their misbehaving office machinery. We didn’t have *hands free* back then … phone, Dr. Pepper, moon-pie, no problems!
Oh, and Jim, IMHO tilt stirring was just gods way of saying “on the road-protean replenishment of passengers” is a good thing.
Tilt steering is for more ‘headroom’.
Rusty,
Bless you for your foresight.
The world would be a better place if all drivers would acknowledge when it’s time to employ a chauffer … no matter what time of life that may be. Also, it’s easier on the progeny — I’ve had to have the “come to jesus” moment due to a small smash-up and incurable macular degeneration.
On a different note, my favorite scene about inattentive driving is in this ridiculous movie “Little Man.” The diaper-changing part really drove it home. So very prosaic.
Petey,
Just curious — as a “farm kid”, you must know what the definition of a “truck” is … so is your “truck” a pete or a kenworth? Or perhaps a mac?
Love them 13 speeds. I prefer an alison automatic tranny, and you?