Me and LBJ
We got some requirements about pants.
Now, I like to have a little room, and I totally understand what LBJ is saying about the crotchal region.
But the zippers.
Jesus, why can’t anyone get the damned zippers right?
I’m not a small guy by any stretch of anyone’s imagination- but about every other pair of dress pants I buy- even khakis, for godsake- have zippers about three inches long.
yeah, three inches from the belt down.
If I wear my pants around my waist, the bottom of the zipper is still four inches above Mr Happy. I have to pull my goddamned pants down on my hips like an asscrack exhibiting ghetto kid to be able to get at the business end of my business. Sometimes I just give up and find a stall and sit. Damn, I’d pay extra for the extra length of zipper, what’s the big goddamned deal?
It’s simple: COST. Doubling the length of zipper may add 5 cents to pair of pants, which doesn’t sound like much until you realize that A)they make millions of ’em and B) actual wholesale cost for pants is revoltingly low – often under $2.
I’m glad to see I’m not the only one iritated by the dinky dinks zippers. The ones I dislike most are the ones with the teeny little tabs that slip down beyond the bottom seam so you have to use something pointed to fish the damn thing out, thereby imperiling Mr Happy greatly. Makes me wish to meet the designer. Just me and it and a tile-lined room with a blood gutter and a butter knife. Ahhh wishful dreaming at its best.
Ed: Fixed your link, Boss. Nice website!!
Have the same problem myself; the problem is, I think the people designing the pants don’t have dicks.
I just wear Levi’s button fly 501. I don’t need to get Mr Happy in a zipper.
The mrs. wouldn’t like it either!
It’s not just the zippers. Even when I still had a waist, I would end up buying pants 4″ too big in the waist, just so I could get some room for the buys, and for my thighs; and that’s wearing them on my hips (as I have since I was about 10 years old).
Seriously I don’t know who they cut these crotches for; but if I wore my pants around my waist instead of my hips, I’d be permanently sterilized.
Well, y’ could learn to sew and add a zipper of any length…
(I’m half serious, too. Sewing is a damned useful skill, and the machines are insane pieces of work in their own right. I still don’t have more than the vaguest idea how my Pfaff works at the “make the stitch happen” level, and I’m pretty mechanically inclined.
Half serious because that kind of major alteration is annoying.)
Hmm, here’s a thought – ever thought of buying pants from a Hong Kong Tailor? They’ll run you more money than a regular pair of slacks, but not that much more, and they’re custom pants. Grand Tailors has regular visits around the US to major cities to take measurements..
Whether you dress to the left or the right,
Watch out for that zipper, ’cause them teeth bite.