Didja ever
rub one out, and then look down at the kickapoo joy juice you just whipped up, and notice that it is bright red, and- somehow- green?
And have a moment of panic before you realized it was just the printer ink you got on your fingers while you were changing the cartridge?
Nah. Me neither.
Nope. Can’t say I have.
Blue once, but that’s another story.
Ever have a prostate biopsy? Imagine a organ the size of a plum stabbed repeatedly with an icepick. Now imagine that this organ can only be reached by going up through your ass, and that this organ is directly responsible for making the stuff that shows up when you rub one out.
The little pamphlet said “you might see some blood in your semen”. Heh. It wasn’t tinged with blood. It wasn’t streaked with blood. It looked like rich arterial blood, and there was a lot of it. Great big manly spurts of bright red blood.
Killed the mood, I say.
I wonder how long it will be before some doctor talks me into letting him do another one of those biopsies?
Thanks for sharing, Og. ;)
There was once a man named Og
Who talked masturbation on his Blog
He said with a Huff
“What the hell is this Stuff
Issuing forth from my manly Hotdog?”
Thank you.
Humans are supposed to be smart enough to use lesser species to do their bidding.
Consider the walk-off. You get into your bathtub and fill it to near the brim. Take some honey and dab it on the little Captain, which should be the only thing left above the water except your head, and open the window. Shortly, flies will come in, smell the honey, land on it an begin to walk around.
Soon, you experience the walk-off.
And you didn’t touch yourself, either, so you don’t have to confess to your priest.
Dog, you’re a nutball. Just the kind of nutball I like just fine.
Dog, but do the flies have “impure thoughts” or just sticky feet??