Curling
I swear to God, when I first saw this on TV, in Canada, I thought it was a Red Green bit. I kept waiting for Harold to show up.
I was assured by the then soon to be ogwife that curling was, indeed, a sport, and one that several of her family members engaged in.
You ain’t lived until you’ve seen a middle aged fat bald man stretched out, sliding down the ice, in a light blue spandex jumpsuit, belly fat skidding on the ice, being propelled by involuntary farts caused by the crouching position. Really. It’s horrid.
The training is hellish, too.
10 comments Og | Uncategorized
I bet they would be great at sweeping and mopping floors.
Maybe Curling should be required for anyone who works in the janitorial services.
NBC – Nothing but Curling.
I swear that’s all that’s on when I click the power button.
Aw, curling ain’t that bad. There’s a curling rink about five miles South of me where the missus and I go to watch on Saturdays once in a while. It’s quiet, mostly Geezers and Geezerettes. They have a nice little concession area where you can sit at tables and drink coffee while you watch. The main draw, though, is the grill. THE. BEST. CHEESEBURGER. EVER! $5 and it comes with real honest to Deity fries fried in beef tallow like God meant them to be and a huge wax paper cup of good ol’ fountain Coke. So with the $5 tickets and $5 burger we can have a better experience than going up to Vancouver and spending 800 fucking dollars for tickets to watch Latvia get its ass handed to it by Finland for the Bronze in Curling. Then we get to pay $150 for a ride in a filthy cab to our shitty $300 a night hotel room, pay over $75 for a gourmet Denny’s greasy, cold breakfast served by a surly Ukrainian immigrant broad with a full beard and mustache before we have our asses handed to us getting back across the fucking border. Go fuck yourself, Canukistan. Vancouver, I hope you go broke. Every last person connected to the IOC should be dragged out behind the barn and shot and the IOC turned over to the Mafia. At least the Mafia can be trusted.
Yanno, Canukistan would be a good place to start a country. All ya need is to clean all the Canukistanis out and start over.
Curling is at least as fun to watch as Olympic Ice Cube Melting.
Gerry N.
Personally, I don’t ever want to live anywhere that requires the regular wearing of long pants again. But,,,if I awoke in a nightmarish frozen hell, and the bowling alley had frozen over……..what the hell. Give me a rock with a handle.
Well, ya know, I watch curling for the hot babes, myself.
Og, curling is king at my house, now.
http://bigdicksplace.com/2010/02/24/nude-women-of-curling.aspx
I know someone who went to Nova Scotia a week at a time for a temp project, and he said curling was on tv there like college football is on Saturdays in the fall down here. He was amazed at how seriously they took their curling. I mean, it’s f’ing curling!
Now they use push brooms to sweep the ice in curling, which isn’t as funny as when they used corn bristle (whisk) brooms, like when I first saw that as a little kid. Two people earnestly swatting brooms in front of a shuffleboard rock, ffft ffft ffft ffft ffft.
Maybe it’s its inherit stupidity, its unabashed goofiness, but like Polka music, curling always makes me giggle and brings a smile to my face. Shuffleboard on ice, taken seriously as a sport.
But played in Spandex, that’s just wrong.
Hey it keeps them off the street!!
What more can you ask??
There seems to be a lot of money in the curling-business – otherwise there wouldn’t be so many amateurs turning into pros in this very athletic sport:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxNGjJyEDzc
Personally I think they invented this “sport” so that unathletic people like the most of us have a chance to participate in the Olympics
Obviously, curling is one of the finest cold-weather drinking games ever invented.