I was stuck between a truck and another truck. I wanted to be in your lane. You stayed directly opposite me, though you had ten or twlve car lengths ahead and behind you. You could have sped up and let me in, you could have slowed down and let me in. And yet, for six miles, you stayed right next to me.

That is why I changed lanes into you, just in case you were wondering. Yes, i heard your horn. Yes, I saw your finger. But you know what? you put down your goddamned phone and paid attention to your driving from that point on.

Mission accomplished.