To the engineer
Who thought it would be a chortling giggleriot to use pressed in bolts on the exhaust system on the wife’s Escape:
Look: I know you have to make this shit to be assembled by the lowest common denominator on the line. I understand that they can never be expected to use two wrenches, let alone their actual brains. But could you just make the press fit on the bolts such that it will come out without a torch? Or make the bolt heads as soft as the damned bolts?
Just a word to the wise. You’ll want to think about this before you’re duct taped to your couch with your eyes stretched open while I have conjugal relations with your household appliances. No amount of lysol will get those images out of your brain, believe me.
13 comments Og | Uncategorized
The system is not designed to be serviced. It is designed to assemble easily on the line, last somewhat in excess of the warrantee period, and be as cheap as possible to make.
Your petty service issues do not concern Ford’s design engineers. In fact, all the evidence taken into account, I think it’s possible they hate you.
Don’t take it personally. After some years in the industry, I suspect Ford engineers to be pathological deranged sociopaths who actively plan ways to make mechanics lives miserable while still designing within appropriate industry guidelines.
If they aren’t, they sure missed a good bet.
The sawzall has become my most-used tool on exhaust systems.
Farghing iceholes….
I don’t know which to blame, Ford engineers or Mazda engineers – collaborative designs are rarely great.
I suspect that engineers that didn’t meet the high standards of pathological deranged sociopathy needed to be a Ford engineer found gainful employment working for Freightliner/DTNA designing Century Class truck tractors.
Actually, regardless of the brand, I think they were all engineered by sadists with a particular preference for inflicting pain upon service technicians.
You guys almost sound like aircraft maintenance technicians working on Lockheed cargo birds. To this day I am convinced that the knuckleheads designing the C-5 Galaxy were high on 2 hits of acid a day, minimum.
Pressed in exhaust bolts? That sounds like a major cluster. What is the manuals proceedure on that, I wonder.
Make sure you unplug the above mentioned appliances. Especially those involving whirling blades or heating elements.
Just a hint.
BGM
I doubt any engineer that can has worked on the designing of a Ford or any modern vehicle, will be disturbed in the slightest by your conjugal relations with his appliances. I would hazard a guess that they will have thought of much worse things to do with the parts.
Steel: You haven’t met me. This is not comedy I threaten.
My all time favorite was the 3 inch long heater hose on my old Grand Marquis. Ford ingeniously put it under the fuel injection so you had to remove most of the intake manifold to get at one end of the hose. Sure was fun trying to patch it on the side of the Borman expressway in the middle of winter to baby it home. Still say engineers should be forced to work as a mechanic the year after they design something so they can see first hand how well (or not) their design worked.
To pull the engine on my F-250, the cab must be removed. Think about that a minute.
Still say engineers should be forced to work as a mechanic the year after they design something so they can see first hand how well (or not) their design worked.
IMHO, nobody should be given an engineering job without at least five to ten years of previous get-hands-dirty shop experience.
I’ll never forget my Dad, after looking under the hood of my 1977 Toyota Corolla SR5, famously remarking that it was clearly designed for tiny-handed Japanese mechanics.
Og: I do not doubt the strength of your promises. I have unfortunately worked with a large number of design engineers, and many of the things I’ve seen them come up with are so abhorrent that one wonders if possibly they got the idea from Cthulhu.