Just got off the phone
with someone I haven’t spoken to in years, over thirty years to be exact.
My high school was very small and my classmates not numerous, I knew them all and knew them well. I guess there has to be a misfit in any crowd, and I was the misfit there.
I suppose in retrospect they’ve all landed on their feet in one way or another. I’m not sure what would make them think I’d fit in anymore now than I did then, he made overtures about getting together but that’s not likely.
So hearing from one of my classmates who sounds very much as though he’s spent the last thirty years attached to a bong, well, it wasn’t any kind of great shakes.
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And that’s why reunions don’t interest me. A five or possibly ten year reunion, you had some years on your own as an adult living your life, so you’re not the person your parents and others decided you were going to be like since you were stuck under their roof, so maybe you could see if the people that didn’t care for the high school you, since you didn’t even care for it, would give the real you a better break. Or maybe you’re now in an improved situation and can try to get the girl you couldn’t in school. Then you had a mission for the reunion.
But once you have decades away from these people, what’s the draw to reconnect for a day and say see you in five years? There’s nothing in common anymore.
I graduated in ’62 in a class of over 1300. I didn’t know any of them then, fewer of them now. The missus browbeat me into going to the 10th Anniversary reunion. I was bored stiff, same cliques, same bullshit. Not interested then, less so now.
Gerry N.
The first and only class reunion I’ve gone to so far was my 31st (yes, my class was so lame that they missed the 30th and had it the next year). And I went mostly to see how my highly-touted classmates had failed to live up to their great promise.
I wasn’t particularly disappointed.
(I should add that I’ve had more fun at my wife’s reunions since we got married — but her class was a lot more fun than mine.)
40th high school reunion was last month.
I didn’t attend any of the others, I didn’t attend this one.
Still the same messed up people, apparently — I got a week’s notice on it. I’m sure all the people that counted got more notice but I’m out of the loop. I don’t think I would have gone anyway.
I was the nerdiest nerd ever in a big jock high school. I was like Queen Band Nerd and still am today, in fact. Have spoken occasionally with someone from high school but just in passing. Amazingly most of them have not changed from my initial impressions, which is scary when you think about it. I hope to hell I’m not the same idjit I was at 13 and 15 and 18. (I’m probably another kind of idjit now but that’s okay, at least I’ve shown some growth.)
I do know two people who were pretty cool when I was in high school and they married one another and they’re still married today. I see them socially every so often and they’re pretty cool now too. Two out of like 300 people. I’m glad I got two!
Jenny
Don’t see them and don’t really miss them. I suppose it will be a 40 something next time we have one. Class was small enough they used a resturant banquet room the last time.
On the other hand if any reach out I would meet with them as it could bring them into the light.
Haven’t seen any of those idiots in decades and feel no poorer for it. I had nothing in common with them when I was in high school and have even less in common with them now.
I left my class of many-hundreds and went two thousand miles away to graduate from a class of 32. At least we know exactly why we don’t like each other instead of being unknowns and vague notions.. My 40th is in 2016 and I won’t be there.
The problem is; you get back together for no real reason but same as you got stuck together, and there’s still nothing there between you but the accident of association and your social adjustments among them are just where you left-off with them, thirty-odd years ago. Associations by choice are much more productive.
I went to a third year reunion. One of the “guides” said “What did you teach?”
Cheeky bugger.
My 10 year reunion was pretty successful; high turnout, with about a 90% attendance of classmates (allowing for deaths, out of country, incarceration, etc). I had a small hand in the planning of it. The 20th year came and went, but our class was invited in toto to the next year’s class festivities, which was very nice as there was a bit of overlap socially between our years. I didn’t get to spend as much time at this one due to chaos in our business world, but I did make a couple of appearances. 30 year? No mention of it. 40 years will be here in 2017, and with the advent of Facebook and other social media we stand a chance of at least ginning up modest interest, although the old hometown has changed dramatically in the last 20 years. A once primarily oilfield economy with skilled tradesmen has become a bedroom community with a heavy influx of immigrant labor with low discernable skills. From 20 major oilfield service and supply houses, three remain as depots for other regions, and now WalMart is the largest private employer in town. The hospital is closed then repurposed as a geriatric inpatient psych facility and the ER (the only Level 3 ER for 30 miles) closes, to be replaced by a Doc in the Box bandaid station from 8a5p M/F. The city-owned property is informed they need to replace the existing helicopter pad at a cost of 1.3 million in order to accomodate the number of daily flights out to major regional hospitals as medivac has gotten larger equipment since the original service started 25 years ago.
Yeah, I’ve quit going back as much as I can. Mom still lives in the big town over a’ways, and sold the big house in the hometown at Christmas. The acreage is being turned into a landscaper yard and greenhouse, and the owner will live in the house and use it as an office. I wish them well.
There’s so much truth to ‘you can never go home again’ that it’s painful sometimes.