So I run out of Gold Bond.
Which would be like Tam running out of ammunition, except she would NEVER run out of ammunition.
Usually I have at least three backups, one at work, one in the car, and one in the range bag. Last night I realized the only one not empty was the one at the office. And so I went to Walgreens. And they seemed to be out of Gold Bond, except the blue variety. Having been a big fan of the Green for a long time, I was reluctant to chage- and then I spotted it, in the shaving needs area! Anyway, I grabbed for the familiar green container and went to put the blue one back, and i looked at them both.
turns out the only difference is Green has 0.8% menthol, and blue has 1%. So I brought the bluehome to see how it was.
Damn.
I’ve said before that Gold Bond Green is cocaine for your boys; If that’s true then Blue is meth. take it from me, boys, this is the real deal.
And then try to find a woman who smokes Kools.
12 comments Og | Uncategorized
LOL. Don’t like the smell of Gold Bond, but you almost make me want to try it.
My T-man smokes Kool Blue. I smoke Newports. He swears the Newports are stronger, more lethal. According to him (and although he’s 10 years older), the Newports are gonna kill me first.
Jus’ sayin’.
Also… I think I may’ve just had one of those “Aha! moments”…
;)
Ooo…see, my normal weapon of choice is Anti-Monkey Butt Powder. Once, when I couldn’t find it, I picked up some gold bond, and umm…maybe I’m a wimp(or maybe it’s because I jumped right in at the blue level without adjusting to the green first), but I found it a bit too much sensation to be able to bear.
I remember doing a ‘oooo…that tingles!’ Dance for about 5 minutes before things backed off.
greg: That is the DESIRED effect.
Of course bigger guys need more protection, so the regular monkey butt stuff is probably fine for normal sized folks
Almost makes me wish I had a pair of “boys!”
I’m sure you can find someone who will let you use theirs for a while.
I work at Chattem. We make Gold bond. I’ll send a link to marketing and see if we can get you a job. They are using Shaq as our commercial spokesman for our men’s products. A job I think you would be well suited for.
Tommy: I would love it- but they use Shaq because he’s good looking. That wouldn’t work for me.
When I climb off the tractor in July, my wife hands me 2 things. A cold beer and my gold bond. Just watch where you put it. That medicated tingle can get uncomfortable.
Roger
Oh, you have to keep it away from mucous membranes, which is why I always carefully shower before any sweaty snugglebunnies. but for me, from the waist down, it’s all go.
OTOH, if I was uncut I might not want any below the hood.
Living in a warmer climate and enjoying the “commando” status 8 or 9 months of the year, is a distinct advantage.
This time of year though, Gold Bond is my Friend.
As for looks? I could make good money from Gold Bond. They’d pay me to never appear in their advertising.
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX