Lazy.
Lazy for feeling, so …
Nevermind. I just know I have not been this unmotivated for a very long time, and I suppose it may well have something to do with the piles of shit I need to do. There’s a forest of down trees in the backyard, and a ton of work that needs done in the house etc. And I just don’t know where to start. So I guess I’m gonna go start in the basement and work my way out. Oy.
I have a lazy streak a mile wide and I war with it daily.
The overwhelmed feeling you mention only makes said lazy streak worse.
I have so many artifacts of it in my life like my Alfa for example. It’s done nothing but gather dust since 2006 because I always lack money and (to a lesser extent) time to fix it up to my view of “right”.
Over the years I’ve been prone to let this push me to despair. Ever since my learning experience in early 2012 I’ve tried to do better at not letting that happen. Our Lord doesn’t want us to despair.
Good to know I’m not the only one.
One of my other weaknesses is selfishness. I probably shouldn’t be shooting IDPA matches the next three Saturdays. I should probably work on projects around the house instead.
But if I sacrifice the fun for the task then the task becomes drudgery and I do it poorly or perhaps not at all.
Leading in a vicious circle back to feelings of despair.
The key is to realize true perfection cannot be achieved in this broken world and to seek His guidance for prioritization.
Add procrastination to the mix with laziness. Procrastination allows me to attend to the things I like and put off the things I dread. In which case the thing I’m laziest about is setting priorities until the devil comes a-knocking.