It dawns on me that Tree Huggers have a misplaced ideology.

Let’s examine this a minute, shall we?

There are no gay trees.
Trees only mate with their own species.
Trees have sex the same way they always have.
Trees have natural enemies, and in millions of years, have developed natural defenses against those who would harm them.
Trees never fail to engage their natural defenses.
Trees are useful, in life, and in death.
Trees usually smell nice.

Damn. I’m gonna go hug a tree. Trees are probably Republicans.