Just after the first of the year, when the Oglet was home on vacation, I thought, I will make some Bubba Burgers, and I will put on them some salsa and avocado, and they will be extra tasty.

So I went and got some bubba burgers. There is always salsa in the house. And I got a perfect avocado. Plenty to put a couple slices on each of three burgers for the wife, the oglet, and I.

I came home, and unpacked, and was just about to toss the bag in the trash when I felt a lump; I reached into the bag and pulled out the avocado I had temporarily forgotten. And then I sat it on the counter.

At which point it disappeared forever.

At first I thought I was being gaslighted, but the wife and daughter swore they hadn’t touched it.

By now, I thought a trail of gnats would lead us to it, but so far no luck. I figure it will turn up someday, but the longer it takes the less I look forward to it.