Neanderpundit

I’ve never been interested in his work with the dead, or his artwork, or the million doses of LSD-25 he synthesised, I was interested in him because he was a longtime proponent of eating Meat. Unlike other hippies, he was the anti-vegetarian, and had he not been killed in a car wreck, he’d still be among us, going strong. He was also a vehement anti-global warming proponent, and had a lot to say on the subject.

Get along, Kid Charlemagne. Hat tip Turk Turon

I drive a lot. I drive more than most people do- well, just about anything. I know a very small handful of people who drive more than I do. So my opinions about cars and driving come from years of personal experience- but they are still my opinions, and I am not a professional driver, and this is not a closed course.

During my life, I have known a lot of people with really, really cool cars. I will say with no hesitation whatsoever that I will shamelessly suck up to anyone with a nice car and try to get them to let me drive it.

I also spend a lot of time on the road, and I get to rent a lot of cars. So I get to see what a lot of different cars are like. National’s “Emerald Club” does a good job of providing a variety, if you travel around enough. So I have driven a lot of cars.

I have also driven quite a few nice cars just by virtue of not drinking. My colleagues and superiors have been known to hunt me out at a business function and give me their keys. Recently, that put me behind the wheel of an Audi A-6.

I like driving. I like driving small cars fast.

I have liked several cars most of all. The first Porsche I ever drove was a 914-6, owned by a friend. Slow and wierd-handling by todays standards, this bastard would pick up an inside front wheel whenever you threw it hard into a turn. Scared the bejesus out of you- but that was the POINT.
A colleague has the Subaru WRX sti. All I can say about that, is “Wow.”
He also has a neighbor with a Boxter S, which is a way cool car, but having been under it, I’d hate to have to work on it on a regular basis.
a Lotus Seven is a balls-out blast, but under “Impractical car” in the dictionary, there’s a picture of a Lotus Sevin, right next to a picture of an Ariel Atom.
A BMW 2002 is a great car. In it’s day, it was an awesome car, but now a production honda will kick it’s ass. What they are, though, is moderately comfortable for someone with long legs, tall, so you can sit upright, and you feel everything the car does. To some, this is not a good thing; Chicago roads tend to have potholes the size of small cars, and if you can feel them as well as see them, you’re going to be uncomfortable.

I love to push a car just a little past its performance edge, and watch how it reacts, and use that knowledge in my driving. I used to drive the same little strip of twisty road in Indiana over and over again, to see how hard I could get into a turn, to see how far I could push loose gravel, to see how much of the road I could actually use before I lost control. You don’t have to have a high performance car to do this. You can do it with an Escort. I know someone right now with a little Beetle with a FAT crate motor that will scare you to death, as he drives, and you won’t ever get over 50 mph. The piece of padded pipe sticking out where the glovebox used to be is called a “jesus bar” There’s a very good reason it’s there.

Because I drive a lot, I know my car intimately. I can feel a brake rotor wearing. I can hear the sound a wheel bearing makes thousands of miles before they fail. I can tell when the tires have worn enough to need replacing without getting out of the car. I pay attention to every little noise, smell, sensation. Other than one part problem (which turned out to be self inflicted) the Exploder has never stranded me, and the maintenance costs (since I buy lifetime parts) are so minimal as to be practically nonexistent. The same was true of my Probe. The same was true of the wife’s Honda. (well, until the Destroyer of Cars began to drive it)

I never got into competition much, i took some driving courses but it was more about developing skills than competing, all I care about is knowing what I can do. To me, driving hard is about a couple things:

Not being an ass. Anyone who drives fast in a neighborhood full of children is an ass. Anyone who blows past an Amish horse and buggy is an ass. You know the drill. Nuff said.

Twisty mountain roads are better than flat expressways.

If I don’t scare myself, I wasn’t doing it right.

I had a Ford Probe GT some ages ago, first car I ever bought brand spanking new. I pushed it hard, wearing out tires at about twice the usual rate. It was a great car, and I enjoyed it. It wasn’t a particularly fast car but it handled reasonably well, had the tunable suspension, and I… did things to it. I broke the law in it everytime I turned the key, and there wasn’t so much as a trip to the grocery store for milk that I didn’t run it sideways.

Ford of Europe makes a lot of really fast little cars. I’ve always been very annoyed that they don’t make them here; I’m not sure if it’s CAFE standards or what. I do know that I’d love to drive one of those little Focus RS suckers. Saleen of Canada makes a Nitrous-ready Focus that cranks out 250 horsepower, and it costs less than my explorer did new in 1998. I’ve seriously considered that.

I have heard the argument that BMW or Mercedes make cars that are better built than Ford, or the quality is somehow better.

Having been under all of those vehicles, I can assure you this is the merest bullshit. People spend more on a BMW, and they take better care of it. A properly cared for vehicle will last longer. I know of a Yugo GT with a quarter million miles, that looks showroom new. My Probe had more than a quarter million miles on it when I sold it, and it’s still going strong in the hands of it’s new owner. And of course my truck will have a half million miles on it before I let it go.

The parts in Euro cars tend to be pricier, the repairs more expensive, and the quality has frankly dropped I haven’t looked at the JD Powers stuff in a couple years, but you regularly saw Porsche, Mercedes, Lexus, and Infinity in the very top, followed closely by… ford. Then Mercury. Some other mfrs come in and out based on a specific car that does particularly well, but the best “normal” cars are made by domestic mfrs. (The Initial quality reports, specifically, are what I’m referring to)

Yes, part of this is due to the bigger service network for US made cars, but frankly even Chrysler is making a better car- well, truck, anyway- than ever before.

One of the things I plan on doing once the Oglet gets her license is to ship her off to Skip Barber and have her run a Miata around the track for a couple days. It’ll probably be Road Atlanta, because I know an official down there who can help her out a great deal. Anyone who wants to be able to drive like a pro, or at least get a feel for how the pros drive, should go to Skip Barber. The open wheel course is well worth the cash. Assuming you can get into the car.

If I had a (does quick calculation. Hmm. Carry the three.. Subtract 10% from MSRP…) hundred dollar bill for every time I used my aging Exploder to pass a

BMW
Corvette
Ferrari, for christ’s sakes
Lotus elise
Lexus ISC
Mercedes SLK
Mustang

all the while screaming “YOU HAVE A SPORTS CAR. DRIVE LIKE IT!!!”

I could go out and buy a new Subaru WRX STI, and then I’d show people how to DRIVE.

For about a week, and then I’d lose my license.