I mean, it’s bad enough that they wake me every day about thirty five minutes before the alarm goes off (So I can’t go back to sleep meaningfully) but they have this annoying habit- always have, really, of filling my bladder to capacity the very moment my hands are covered in grease and i’m knee deep in some clusterfuck. Then I have to dance while I try to get my hands clean enough to touch my pecker, and the water is invariably cold.

THe water I’m washing my hands with, not the water in the toilet, by the way.